| just a question |
[17 Jun 2006|03:37am] |
if everyone where to drop dead right now, would everyone be happy with how they are right now?
just curious. cuz i dont think maybe people would be.
lighten up everyone just live your life.
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[22 May 2006|10:05pm] |
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mood |
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 numb |
] |
There's nothing to live for when I'm sleeping alone
And I wash the windows outside in hopes that the glare will bring you around
(empty)
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[23 Apr 2006|08:28pm] |
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mood |
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melancholy |
] |
I really don't know what I'm going to do anymore.
My whole world has shattered into basically nothing.My girlfriend means more to me than anything in the world and the only thing that is still keeping me going is her and a few close friends who won't leave me as I go through this. I can't believe that you took advantage of me when I was in another state of mind. I can't stop crying because I realized how hurt I am that I couldn't have stopped this from happening.
No one will believe me so I don't care about sympathy in this situations I have my friends and my family and thats all that matters. I like girls and I always have and I promised myself I would never but stuck in a situation like I was that night but I have always believed that things happen for a reason but I don't understand why me.. why this? I am at a loss for words and I am so angry that I took you in as a close friend and that I went into that room with you. I still can't stop crying.
I never thought this would happen to me
ever.
I never wanted anything close to this to happen.How am I suppost to care for another when I can't even take care of myself , still live at home, and just recently got a job again. I'm not ready to accept this and it hurts so fucking much.So much that I want to say I hope you die for doing this to me but I won't. I don't even want you around me ever again.
What is my family going to think?
What are my friends going to think?
I need my friends to stay by my side..
please don't leave me alone like this
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[08 Apr 2006|03:38am] |
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mood |
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lonely |
] |
as the many fade to barely,
there will soon be one left around me,
and he sleeps at the foot of my bed....
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| im not out of cigarettes yet. |
[31 Mar 2006|03:27am] |
compare it? express it? explain it? i cant.
the nearest comparison i can think of is like stage fright. right before you get on stage doing something you arent sure of and unconvident about and your self esteem is below sea level and you look out are there are all these people, who knows what there thinking, and your stomach feels so nervous and raw. once its over with you feel good and fine and relize it wasnt much to worry about. you even relize before when your insides are turning that there isnt much to worry about, but its there. and the relief of when its over... but that feeling comes around again, and once again, till its over, your insides burn as if you drank bleach. but like most feelings it fades, and gets better. you make me happy. but the happiest you provide me is intimidating. and i love you. and ill work on it.
i never write in here.
is why i am.
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| mur |
[17 Mar 2006|12:57am] |
i have been working on this giant jawbreaker all fucking day.
and i miss mariah.
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| Song number 7 |
[16 Oct 2005|09:54pm] |
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mood |
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Itchy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Dinosaurs |
] |
I wrote a whole entry for Lanna and then my computer decided it wanted to combine powers with livejournal and screw my life over and everything I wrote quickly vanished before my eyes.
Clean your room asshole.
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[12 Jun 2005|10:51pm] |
Ok i lied tracye doesnt like to dance with me..
god....
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[03 Apr 2005|09:23pm] |
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These runts are making my tounge numb.
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[27 Mar 2005|02:13pm] |
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hahah this icon is love.
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[22 Jan 2005|12:50pm] |
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mood |
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 annoyed |
] |
ok... Im done trying. I try, i make an effort... but o well screw it. Im done.
You just let me know, or just keep it.
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[25 Sep 2004|07:42pm] |
I love our band show..
I had fun today. Lots and lots.
Went ice skating and visited lauren and brought her pizza and hung out with... monica, carolyn, matt, jared, cynthia and ricky. = )
Going skim boarding tommarro w/ jared and jimmy. Hes gonna teach me.
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[13 Jul 2004|10:07pm] |
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*sigh* Im better off without it.
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[06 Jul 2004|06:43pm] |
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im sad like an emo kid on downers.
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[12 Jun 2004|08:22pm] |
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mood |
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 pissed off |
] |
Damnit now im pissy.
Shrek 2 make me happy!! yay!!
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[12 Jun 2004|05:27pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 confused |
] |
Damn i really dont want to be bored tonite. *sigh*
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[12 Jun 2004|11:39am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 gloomy |
] |
You never knew,
Well i never told you,
everything i learned about breaking hearts,
i learned from you.
Well, ive just been working and at band.
I love band. I love drumming. What a rush. Its the only thing i can run to when im upset. Ill just go play some music.
Emma <3 Krystal hehe..
You depress me.
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[11 Jun 2004|10:32am] |
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Showing Krystal a beautiful emma.
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[27 May 2004|11:30pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 exhausted |
] |
whoa... that was an awesome night, i saw like everyone i ever wanted. i saw *takes a deep breath* chris boheme, manduh, ronnie, robin, candice, tim, john, jimmy, alicia, dave, lil lauren, ram, alex, josh, kelly, ashley, jared, brandon, like everyone from lunch, man i saw alot of people. And i had a smashing good time. Thanks to ron for picking me up. Boo to those assholes who took away the pizza. I was hungry... it was lots of fun. Me and jared went running thru the kids skanking in the middle of the floor. We just ran in circles lol... Me and candice got some pizza. Me, josh and manduh took mad pictures... well manduh did, but i 'ruined all her photo ops.'.... opps... sry lol it was an excellent day. Now im a seinor.. wow how weird is that! Well im gonna go im a bit sleepy...
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